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You are definitely not alone. There is something called 'personal space,'
and it varies as a function of stress/lack of stress, familiarity of
approach (stranger/loved one or
friend), etc.
When I'm upset, or REALLY concentrating on something, I notice that when
even folks I care about, come closer than about five feet, I get
uncomfortable. When I'm working on
something that requires my full attention, my 'DIScomfort zone expands to
fill my entire office (all 8 x 10 feet of it :), and it doesn't seem to
matter whether it's friend or foe who is trying to get my attention--they'd
better knock on the door and wait for a response. Sometimes my family
'forgets,'
just to see if they can still make me jump! It's my ADD hyperfocus, I
guess!
I find that if I take a slow, deep breath (inhaling through the nose), and
let it out slowly through my mouth, that helps release (literally, I think)
some of the tightness/nervousness/whatever.
Bottom line? It's rude beyond belief for anyone to stand over another's
shoulder, (unless, as you stated, it's by invitation) and you are completely
within bounds to ask the person to step back or sit down or leave--whatever
you're comfortable with.
Warmly,
Melody
"Take the Shoes Off Your Mind!"(c)
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