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Okay, Tom, now I feel like the little girl in The Exorcist. My head is really spinning here.
DM Brown wrote:
"Having tried once already, off-list, to counter Mr. Eagles' remarks, I was about to try again--on-list, this time, since that is his preference."
Then I wrote:
Is there any way to determine a priori whether it is better to disagree with you in private or in public? (Let me note here that this was not directed at you or at anyone else in particular, and you and I have never exchanged words regarding any disagreement, on or off list.)
Then DMBrown replied to that:
Seems obvious to me that an off-list message requires an off-list reply.
This did not answer the question I asked, which was about whether it was better to disagree privately or publicly with something posted ON the list.
Now you have replied to that:
Funny what some of us find "obvious." I find it obvious that if you respond to a public thread with an off-list response, ... then you notify the person that it is an off-list reply. ... What's my point? If you wanted to keep it off-list, you shoulda said so. Furthermore, your points didn't seem inflammatory, irrelevant, or of no interest to the ongoing thread. Thus, why make it off-list?
Okay, I'm going to try to ask simpler questions this time.
1. Did you, in fact, express to Mr. Brown that he should not have written to you off-list (I don't care what the context was; I'm just asking a yes or no question)?
2. Is there a general rule of netiquette that applies in this situation?
3. If the answer to 2 is Yes and if the comment I want to make to you is off-topic for techwr-l, is it better to break the rule about off-topic posts or to break the rule about not writing to you privately?
Let me add that I do not have an axe to grind here. I'm trying, with the flattest affect I am capable of, to solicit opinions about the best way to deal with the situation described above. This is not personal. My feelings are not hurt. I am not angry. I am curious (neither yellow nor blue).
Dick
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