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If you choose to confront, be ready for the DemonSME to pretend that nothing
is the matter, to imply that you are delusional. Have concrete, objective
evidence. And if need be, gently pin her to the wall with it--present the
facts and don't budge an inch on anything about which you are certain (such
as the funky edits).
Good luck!
Leonard Porrello
Compaq, Telecom Solutions Division
Pubs, Omaha
402.384.7390
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Beth Agnew
> Sent: Thursday, August 20, 1998 3:39 PM
> To: TECHWR-L -at- LISTSERV -dot- OKSTATE -dot- EDU
> Subject: Re: DemonSME (long)
>
>
> Here's what I suggest:
> 1. Choose a time and a (private) place to confront
> the DemonSME (I like that nickname!). Tell her,
> nicely, that you perceive a problem with
> your working relationship, and you'd like to
> clear things up. Don't let her pressure you into
> talking about it there and then. Make sure you have
> neutral turf, and that you have had time to mentally
> prepare for battle. But don't make it too far in the
> future, you need to address this soonest! Besides,
> she can stew for a bit. You don't need to be
> accusatory, even though you have every right. Try
> to keep it as non-threatening as possible.
>
> 3. When you meet with this woman, remind her of your
> qualifications for the job -- perhaps she isn't aware
> of your background. Tell her your expectations of working
> with SMEs (not her specifically). Then outline where your
> working relationship has not met those expectations. Make
> it all very non-personal. Don't accuse her of anything,
> even if she's guilty, or attack her personally.
> If she becomes defensive, don't get sucked into
> defending yourself. Let her rant. Nod if you want, but then
> re-iterate how you would like the working relationship
> to go on from there. Calmly discuss the matter. No matter
> how angry she gets, or you feel, remain calm. Don't even
> raise your voice. If she starts arguing, calmly (not
> snarkily) say that it seems conditions are not right to
> continue the discussion just now, and perhaps you both
> need to take a break. Does she want to reschedule the
> meeting for another time? This gives her an out. You want
> to confront her, not corner her.
>
> Whenever she makes a snide remark, smile
> sweetly, with that amused but tolerant expression
> we use when children make silly comments, and
> counter her remark in an adult fashion. "Not my
> first job out of college, probably my thousandth."
>
> You also might want to start giving your boss
> little progress reports that remind him how good
> you really are. "Just thought you'd like to know
> that I finished those chapters ahead of schedule."
>
> Good luck!
> --Beth
>
> Beth Agnew
> Senior Technical Writer, InSystems Technologies Inc.
> 65 Allstate Parkway, Suite 100 Tel: (905) 513-1400 ext. 280
> Markham, Ontario, Canada L3R 9X1 Fax: (905) 513-1419
>mailto:bagnew -at- insystems -dot- com Visit us at: http://www.insystems.com
>
> See my friendly face at:
>http://www.bayside.net/users/cbsites/techwr-l/a.htm#agnewb
>
>
>
