RE: Grammar (again!)

Subject: RE: Grammar (again!)
From: "Ed" <hamonwry12 -at- hotmail -dot- com>
To: <dvora -at- tech-challenged -dot- com>, <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com>
Date: Wed, 20 May 2009 12:18:30 -0400

My .02:

We licensed six of our technologies to other companies, which are currently
in various stages of development.

I think it clarifies things a bit, and also turns to active voice. However,
I'm confused if the technologies are being developed by your company, or the
companies to which they're licensed.

-=Ed.

> -----Original Message-----
> From: techwr-l-bounces+hamonwry12=hotmail -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
> [mailto:techwr-l-bounces+hamonwry12=hotmail -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com] On
> Behalf Of Deborah Hemstreet
> Sent: Wednesday, May 20, 2009 11:53 AM
> To: techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
> Subject: Grammar (again!)
>
> Hi All,
>
> When writing text for a brochure, which do you believe reads more
> smoothly:
>
> 1. We have licensed out six technologies that are in various stages of
> development...
>
> 2. We have licensed out six technologies in various stages of
> development...
>
> Could you explain WHY you believe 1 or 2 is better than the other? I
> don't want to give my opnion, as I want as objective a response as
> possible.
>
> Thanks!
>
> Deborah
> http://www.tech-challenged.com
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

ComponentOne Doc-To-Help 2009 is your all-in-one authoring and publishing
solution. Author in Doc-To-Help's XML-based editor, Microsoft Word or
HTML and publish to the Web, Help systems or printed manuals.
http://www.doctohelp.com

Help & Manual 5: The complete help authoring tool for individual
authors and teams. Professional power, intuitive interface. Write
once, publish to 8 formats. Multi-user authoring and version control! http://www.helpandmanual.com/

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Follow-Ups:

References:
GUI Elements defined: From: Bruce Megan (ST-CO/ENG2.2)
Re: GUI Elements defined: From: Gregory P Sweet
Re: GUI Elements defined: From: Chris Morton
Grammar (again!): From: Deborah Hemstreet

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