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This situation went way beyond worrying about who to keep as a contact on
LinkedIn. It was IMHO a really bad, awful, nearly abusive work experience.
If you don't want a repeat of a bad experience, be judicious of the names
you communicate publicly that you associate with. Most folks completely
understand that you don't have a close and personal relationship with all of
your social media networking contacts. However, if you feel you were abused,
misused, or cannot find an iota of value in an experience you had, then you
move on and don't hold on to the relationships or the experience. Otherwise,
you attract more of the same when looking for the next job or gig. If John
is a jerk of a manager, it's likely his peers are also jerks or they don't
want to be associated with him any longer as well. You're rewarding being
treated badly by a jerk of a manager when you give him access to your
contacts and you're exposing yourself to others who think you'll work like a
dog under bad conditions with no recognition. Do you really think your work
doesn't suffer in the end? What would you prefer? To be known as the guy
who'll work anywhere, anytime, under any conditions (with managerial
expectations of "poor work quality") or be known as the guy who can do an
excellent job, can make reasonable, informed decisions, and plays well in
the sandbox?
Rumor mills, bad experiences, and bad relationships follow us around when
retain them and communicate them. When looking for contacts and trimming
that contact list or adding to it, someone else also mentioned this--be
judicious and ask yourself what value these persons can be to you? They
might not offer you your next job, but they can be a stepping stone on the
path by providing information or insight or and introduction to the person
who will. Define what you want and expect from your next gig before you go
after another job--and use those contacts who can be valuable in leading you
to that destination. What you want and expect should go beyond your monetary
compensation.
In this job market, it doesn't pay to appear to be so eager for a job that
you'll bark up the tree of any one or any company who's abusive or foolish.
That might sound contradictory considering how bad the job market is, but
managerial behavior is a sign of how well a company is run. If it's run by
jerks and fools who don't have the cajones to stand up to impossible demands
and requirements, you'll notice how fast that all runs down hill.
On Tue, Sep 13, 2011 at 9:28 PM, Gene Kim-Eng <techwr -at- genek -dot- com> wrote:
> IMO, if you're a manager and you can't find some way to clue your
> subordinates in to the fact that something bad is looming on the horizon,
> you're just not trying. Even if you've been specifically directed to say
> nothing about upcoming cuts, answering staff questions (and there will
> always be questions, because employee rumor mills are invariably the fastest
> and most accurate information systems in any company) by saying you're "not
> at liberty to discuss staffing issues at this time" will do the job (and
> yes, I've done it).
>
> I have a special place on my grudge list for managers who don't watch out
> for their people. It isn't necessary for someone to have deliberately
> deceived or harmed; indifference is sufficient.
>
> Gene Kim-Eng
>
>
> ----- Original Message ----- From: "Chantel Brathwaite" <
> brathwaitec -at- castupgrade -dot- com>
>
> In this case, while this wasn't handled well, it doesn't necessarily sound
>> to me from what was written like it was a personal thing.
>>
>
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