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Subject:Suffering succotash From:Mark Levinson <mark -at- SD -dot- CO -dot- IL> Date:Fri, 11 Nov 1994 11:39:15 IST
Version #1
They are discussing the trials of their lives, and who among them has had to
endure the most suffering, but in doing so they are also identifying who has
been the cause of **these** sufferings.
Version #2
They are discussing the trials of their lives, and who among them has had to
endure the most suffering, but in doing so they are also identifying who has
been the cause of **those** sufferings.
** Though interesting, the distinction between "these" and "those" isn't
the primary pebble in this succotash.
The plural "these/those sufferings" at the end of the sentence is torn
between referring to the earlier "suffering" and the even earlier "trials".
- The earlier "suffering" should have been referred to as singular,
not as plural.
But my guess is that the sentence doesn't mean they
identified the cause of that suffering-- of the particular suffering
belonging to the one that endured the most. I think the sentence
means they identified the cause of all the participants' suffering.
- Considering that the participants were probably identifying the cause
of everybody's suffering, "these/those sufferings" actually refers to
the "trials" at the beginning of the sentence. But to ask the reader
to understand that "sufferings" really refers to "trials" rather than
to "suffering" is to give the distinction between "suffering" and
"sufferings" a heavier job than it can handle.
Is anyone still reading? A minimal fix would be to use neither "these"
nor "those," since neither one can refer successfully back to
anything earlier in the sentence. Just say "their sufferings."
Or if you refuse to dodge the these/those question (and don't want to
rewrite the sentence much), change "sufferings" to "trials" and use
"those", in the sense of "the ones I mentioned earlier." You could
alternatively use "these", in the sense of "the ones I am or will be
talking about", if the sentence is not yet the end of the passage
about the sufferings or if, perhaps for the sake of advocacy, you want
a sense of immediacy at all cost; but as English, "those" is the
safer choice in this case. The folks who were discussing the trials
of their own lives would be having more of a "these" discussion.
__________________________________________________________________________
||- Mark L. Levinson, mark -at- sd -dot- co -dot- il -- Box 5780, 46157 Herzlia, Israel -||
|| You can't judge right by looking at the wrong. - Willie Dixon ||
