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Subject:RE: Getting Along Despite Interpersonal Skills From:holmegm -at- attbi -dot- com To:"TECHWR-L" <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- raycomm -dot- com> Date:Tue, 03 Jun 2003 12:30:58 +0000
Anonymous wrote:
>Here's a question for the group: what do you do with a coworker
>(writer) who has TERRIBLE interpersonal skills?
Work with him? You're his coworker, not manager, right?
>This person started working with us about a year and a half ago.
>He has managed to aggravate and alienate most of the developers,
>who have always been great to work with (for me)...
Are you sure? Have you polled the developers, or just gossiped with
them to see if you can find one or more who also dislike him? How
has he alienated them?
>He cannot seem to work as part of a team at all, seldom
>considering when his need to "tweak" one last thing might cause other
>team members extra work.
Ah, something (possibly) factual. That might be something you could
discuss with your manager, and address.
>He doesn't "chat" wit people unless he wants something from them.
Perhaps he doesn't find your conversation sparkling?
>He has very poor social skills. We try to include him in social
>outings, but he ends up talking about work or sitting there quietly
>and not contributing to conversations
Why is this a problem? If you don't enjoy his company socially, why
seek it out? If you don't enjoy the company of someone who sits
quietly, then don't invite him.
>...What do you do with someone like that? Figure they'll learn in time?
>How would they learn?
If there are factual things that need addressing, address them.
Establish procedures for collaborating on projects, to prevent his last
minute tweaking from impacting the workloads of others. You may or may
not find that some of the "tweaking" is actually necessary. If there is
a genuine problem in his communication style, within the team or with
other teams, address it specifically and factually, with the involvement
of the manager.
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